{"id":3780,"date":"2013-05-31T10:00:13","date_gmt":"2013-05-31T15:00:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/?p=3780"},"modified":"2013-06-11T16:24:50","modified_gmt":"2013-06-11T21:24:50","slug":"voices-of-the-voiceless-confessions-of-a-gay-mennonite-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/2013\/voices-of-the-voiceless-confessions-of-a-gay-mennonite-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Voices of the Voiceless: Confessions of a gay Mennonite"},"content":{"rendered":"<style><!--\n\/* Font Definitions *\/\n@font-face\n\t{font-family:Times;\n\tpanose-1:2 0 5 0 0 0 0 0 0 0;\n\tmso-font-charset:0;\n\tmso-generic-font-family:auto;\n\tmso-font-pitch:variable;\n\tmso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}\n@font-face\n\t{font-family:\"\uff2d\uff33 \u660e\u671d\";\n\tmso-font-charset:78;\n\tmso-generic-font-family:auto;\n\tmso-font-pitch:variable;\n\tmso-font-signature:-536870145 1791491579 18 0 131231 0;}\n@font-face\n\t{font-family:\"Cambria Math\";\n\tpanose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;\n\tmso-font-charset:0;\n\tmso-generic-font-family:auto;\n\tmso-font-pitch:variable;\n\tmso-font-signature:-536870145 1107305727 0 0 415 0;}\n@font-face\n\t{font-family:Cambria;\n\tpanose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;\n\tmso-font-charset:0;\n\tmso-generic-font-family:auto;\n\tmso-font-pitch:variable;\n\tmso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}\n \/* Style Definitions *\/\np.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal\n\t{mso-style-unhide:no;\n\tmso-style-qformat:yes;\n\tmso-style-parent:\"\";\n\tmargin:0cm;\n\tmargin-bottom:.0001pt;\n\tmso-pagination:widow-orphan;\n\tfont-size:12.0pt;\n\tfont-family:Cambria;\n\tmso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;\n\tmso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;\n\tmso-fareast-font-family:\"\uff2d\uff33 \u660e\u671d\";\n\tmso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;\n\tmso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;\n\tmso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;\n\tmso-bidi-font-family:\"Times New Roman\";\n\tmso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;}\n.MsoChpDefault\n\t{mso-style-type:export-only;\n\tmso-default-props:yes;\n\tfont-family:Cambria;\n\tmso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;\n\tmso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;\n\tmso-fareast-font-family:\"\uff2d\uff33 \u660e\u671d\";\n\tmso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;\n\tmso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;\n\tmso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;\n\tmso-bidi-font-family:\"Times New Roman\";\n\tmso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;}\n@page WordSection1\n\t{size:612.0pt 792.0pt;\n\tmargin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;\n\tmso-header-margin:36.0pt;\n\tmso-footer-margin:36.0pt;\n\tmso-paper-source:0;}\ndiv.WordSection1\n\t{page:WordSection1;}\n--><\/style>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/05\/voices.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-3821 alignleft\" alt=\"voices\" src=\"http:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/05\/voices-300x200.jpg\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/05\/voices-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/05\/voices.jpg 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>By Laura Tait<\/p>\n<p><i>(Writer\u2019s note: Identifying details in this article have been changed because the subject is not publicly open about his sexual orientation.)<\/i><\/p>\n<p>In addition to being smart, funny, politically conservative, and an entrepreneur, Jude is also same-sex oriented, a secret he has kept from his parents and most of his community.<\/p>\n<p>Now living in Winnipeg, this 25-year-old Mennonite man from Winkler, Man., has a shy and humble nature, evident in his composure as he sits in a coffee shop for an interview.<\/p>\n<p>Family has always been important for Jude, who works with his parents in the family business. However, there is a tension he holds with his family that he believes can never be reconciled.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMy parents are the only people I\u2019ve ever wanted to please, but they\u2019re also people that can never totally accept me for who I am,\u201d Jude says.<\/p>\n<p>Jude finds himself stuck between not relating completely to his community in Winkler, and not relating with modern \u201cgay culture.\u201d This dichotomy has put a strain on Jude as he tries to navigate these dual lives\u2014being \u201cout\u201d in his personal life, and \u201cin\u201d in his family and professional life.<\/p>\n<p>Much of the motivation for hiding his sexual orientation comes from the stigma against same-sex orientation he sensed while growing up in Winkler.<\/p>\n<p>He has no intention of ever telling his school or church friends from Winkler about his sexual orientation because he believes he would not be received kindly.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIn Mennonite families, shaming is a big business,\u201d Jude says. \u201cSome places have drive-by shootings, Winkler has drive-by shamings. Saying nothing about it means less shaming than acknowledging what people might suspect.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jude feels it\u2019s the prospect of being shamed that colours much of his family\u2019s prejudice against same-sex oriented people. The thought of their own son being one of these people would cause them anxiety: what would people at church think? For Jude, trying to tell his family something they don\u2019t want to know isn\u2019t worth the tears, hurt, and denial.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYour parents say they\u2019ll love you no matter what, but the thought of them knowing something like this makes me wonder, do they really?\u201d Jude says.<\/p>\n<p>Another aspect framing his family\u2019s prejudice against same-sex oriented people is stereotypical, flamboyant \u201cgay culture,\u201d which Jude has no interested in being associated with.<\/p>\n<p>Jude laments how LGBT Pride parades, that used to be respectable political protests, have turned into flashy displays of scantily clad folks dancing atop floats.<\/p>\n<p>For Jude, maintaining a bit of humour is important. From when his mother asks him about any women in his life, to dealing with people associated with the kind of \u201cgay culture\u201d he wants to avoid, his mantra remains: \u201cIf you don\u2019t laugh, you cry.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>While many same-sex oriented people often feel isolated from the church and their faith, this does not describe Jude\u2019s experience. He finds comfort in a church congregation in Winnipeg that he feels is more accepting of his orientation.<\/p>\n<p>He believes stigma against same-sex oriented persons is a product of a history informed by human beings, and not one of God.<\/p>\n<p><i>Laura Tait is a student at Canadian Mennonite University. She wrote this article as part of her work in the course Journalism\u2014Principles and Practices. \u201cVoices of the Voiceless\u201d is a class project that aims to chronicle the humanity of often-ignored people on the margins of our community.<\/i><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\"><span style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman';\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By Laura Tait (Writer\u2019s note: Identifying details in this article have been changed because the subject is not publicly open about his sexual orientation.) In addition to being smart, funny, politically conservative, and an entrepreneur, Jude is also same-sex oriented, a secret he has kept from his parents and most of his community. Now living [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[156,376],"tags":[406,434,404,433,84,403],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3780"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3780"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3780\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3877,"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3780\/revisions\/3877"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3780"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3780"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cmu.ca\/media_archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3780"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}